 | This page contains material that is kept because it is considered humorous. Such material is not meant to be taken seriously. |
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This user is visiting from an alternate universe. |
 | This user's homeworld is mostly harmless. |
| band | This user plays in a band. |
 | This user plays the guitar. |
 | This user plays the bass guitar. |
 | This user lives in the U.S. State of Texas. |
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This user is a Cannibal. |
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This user is a Snuff film director. |
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This user still plays Red Faction. |
| Caboose | This user likes food-nap time. |
| GITS | This user has a Stand Alone Complex. |
| This user has one of them black cubes of ultimate power. |
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This user also has one of them white cubes of ultimate power. |
 | This user found the gold cube of ultimate power! |
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This user has a 4-D cube of ultimate power. |
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This user has the Morphing Red Cube of Ultimate Power! |
| MD | This user drinks Mountain Dew. |
| Forden | Toasty! |
| ... | This user is a professional procrastinator. |
| ?? | This user is a Secret Character. |
| This user plays the bass guitar. |
| mach | This user watches machinima. |
 | This user knows it's better to reign in Hell than to serve in Heaven. |
 | This user enjoys the works of Arthur C. Clarke. |
 | This user reads science fiction. |
| OSC | This user enjoys the works of Orson Scott Card. |
 | This user prefers the PlayStation Portable over the Nintendo DS. |
| PS2 | This user plays games on the PlayStation 2. |
 | This user prefers the Xbox and the PlayStation 2 to the GameCube. |  |
| AC | This user believes that a plane can change the tides of war. |
 | This user is an escaped genetic experiment. |
 | This user enjoys smoking cannabis. |
 | This user is right-handed. |
 | This user supports the fight against breast cancer. |
 | This user supports the fight against testicular cancer. |
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This user supports stem cell research. |
| o_O | This user is a moderate fan of anime. |
| GITS | This user has a Stand Alone Complex. |
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This user is not going to sleep... They get you when you sleep... |
| Z | This user is a zombie and enjoys watching zombie films. |
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This user believes life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you're gonna get. |
| The Good | In this world, there's two kinds of users: Those with loaded guns, and those who dig. You dig. |
 | This user eats jam and ham and Spam a lot. |
 | This user is addicted to video games. |
| game dev | This user is interested in video game development. |
 | This user plays the Xbox 360. |
| X | This user plays the Xbox. |
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This user plays the Doom series. |
 | This user once loved Grand Theft Auto. |
 | This user plays the Halo series. |
 | This user plays Quake. |
 | This user plays the Sonic the Hedgehog series. |
| This user is a carnivore. |
 | This user eats cheese. |
 | This user eats chili. |
 | This user loves to eat pizza. |
 | This user eats potato chips. |
 | This user loves spaghetti. |
 | This user has eaten MREs and lived to tell the tale. |
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This user is a carnivore. |
 | This user loves to eat beef. |
 | This user eats chicken. |
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This user loves bacon! |
 | This user loves hamburgers. |
 | This user prefers pepperoni pizza. |
 | This user prefers New York pizza |  |
 | This user loves pasta. |
 | This user eats quesadillas. |
 | This user eats ham. |
 | This user bows down before the awesome might of Vodka. |
| MEAD | This user drinks mead. |
 | This user drinks Mountain Dew. |
 | This user loves brownies. |
 | This user eats M&Ms. |
 | This user eats Peanut Butter Cookies. |
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This user is against computer and video game censorship and regulation. |
 | This user is Knee-Deep in the Dead. IDSPISPOPD IDDQD |
| This user is addicted to video games. |
| ! | This user plays the Metal Gear series. |
| FC | This user is not a beautiful or unique snowflake. |
| Clerks. | This user is not even supposed to be here today! |
| FC | This user does not talk about Fight Club. |
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This user is in a glass case of emotion. |
 | This user is a fan of the Austin Powers film series. Yeah, baby, yeah! |
| PULP | This user does not think Marsellus Wallace looks like a bitch. |
| TA | Bak user derka derka derka! |
 | This user accepts the alias Pink. |
| ALIEN | This user will never look at dinner the same way again. |
| ∞ | This user is an ageless immortal. |
 | Grrr! Brains! Brains! |
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All your base are belong to this user. |
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This user enjoys indiscriminate pillaging. |
 | This user does not exist. However, if this user begins to exist, seek shelter immediately. |
 | This user is interested in firearms and is generally knowledgeable about them. |
 | This user enjoys pistol shooting. |
 | This user enjoys rifle shooting. |
 | This user is interested in counter-terrorism. |
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This user is interested in tanks. |
 | This user believes that hippies, celebrities, and politicians are NOT experts on climate change. |
 | This user is against involuntary military service. |
 | This user believes it is every citizen's duty to vote. |
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This user prefers that the death penalty be used far more often. |
 | This user wants Puerto Rico to either be a U.S. state or a sovereign country.† |  |
 | This user is against strict gun control. |
 | This user believes that the Republic of China is a legitimate nation. |
 | This user opposes the policies and views of Hillary Clinton. |
 | This user is interested in World War II |
 | This user is interested in the history of the Cold War. |  |
 | This user is interested in ancient Rome. |
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This user is interested in the military history of ancient Rome.
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| America's Drive-In |
This user loves to eat at his local Sonic Drive-In. |
 | This user eats at Taco Bell. |
| This user eats at KFC. |
 | This user eats at SUBWAY and eats fresh. |
 | This user likes Ice cream. |
| TDS | This user watches the most trusted name in fake news. |
| rvb | This user is a Red vs. Blue fanatic. |
| FG | This user thinks Family Guy is freakin' sweet. |
 | Good news, everyone! This user is a fan of Futurama! |
| ABE | This user is not a communist! They may be a liar, a pig, an idiot, a communist, but they are not a porn star! |
| MWC | A fat woman came into this user's shoe store today. |
| TCR | This user has balls, and isn't afraid to use them. |
 | This user could use a little more cowbell. |
| BAMF | This user is one BAMF among many |
 | This user reads Dark Horse Comics . |
| fan-3 | This user thinks that Call of Duty 4: Modern Warfare is the best computer or video game ever made. |
| fan-2 | This user loves the computer or video game Metal Gear Solid. |
| fan-1 | This user enjoys the computer or video game Star Fox. |
| fan-0 | This user dislikes the computer or video game Final Fantasy. |
| fan-0 | This user dislikes the computer or video game Halo. |
| APBR | This user thinks Doom is the best game ever. |
| DN | It's time to kick ass and chew bubble gum, but this user is all out of gum. |
| Deus Ex | This user wears sunglasses during night operations. |
| 47 | This user plays the Hitman video game series. |
| Q4 | This user plays Quake 4. |
| iron fist | This user is a Tekken player |
| UT | This user plays Unreal Tournament. |
 | This user enjoys reading short stories. |
| Dune | This user knows that fear is the mind-killer. |
| GW | This user reads Guitar World. |
| band-3 | This user likes Led Zeppelin. |
| band-3 | This user likes Cannibal Corpse. |
| S | This user is a fan of Slayer. |
| NIИ | This user is closer to God. |
| band-3 | This user likes Pig Destroyer. |
| band-3 | This user likes Motorhead. |
| band-2 | This user listens to Staind. |
 | This user listens to industrial. |
 | This user appreciates real punk music. |
 | This user enjoys punk rock. |
 | This user enjoys rock music. |
 | For those about to rock, this user salutes you! |
 | This user enjoys heavy metal music. |
 | This user knows that there is no dark side of the moon really — matter of fact it's all dark. |
 | This user advocates the use of more cowbell. |
| MA | This user has an account on Metal-Archives. |
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This user is Pro-Choice. |
User:Justin L Raines/Userboxes/Abortion and Capital Punishment
 | This user supports the anarchist movement. |
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This user is a supporter of the anarchist movement, but not of the violent stereotypes often placed on them. |
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This user is disgusted by the overblown media coverage of celebrities. |
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This user activates the Stargate to invade other planets. |
| SG | This user activates the Stargate to explore other planets. |
| Carr | This user could spare a few minutes for cancer research, but he or she isn't going to get much done. |
 | This user knows what was in the case. |
| This user does not like Avenged Sevenfold. |
| BR | This user is a fan of BAD RELIGION. |
| AC/ DC | This user is a fan of AC/DC. |
| BB | This user is on a mission from God. |
 | There is no hope, why don't you... pull the plug! |
| DBS | This user is a die-hard Death By Stereo fan. |
| This user does not like Green Day. |
| This user does not like Korn. |
| M | This user is a fiend for life. |
 | This user is out of step. |
 | This user is a fan of Metallica. |
| MA | This user is a fan of Morbid Angel. |
| MM | This user loves Monster Magnet |
| TO | This user is a fan of The Offspring. |
| QOTSA | This user is a fan of Queens of the Stone Age. |
 | Dieser Benutzer ist ein Fan von Rammstein. |
| RUSH | This user has no heart to lie. |
| M*A*S*H | This user understands: "the M stands for mobile". |
| #270 | This user loves My Name Is Earl |
| 70s | This user thinks anyone who doesn't like That '70s Show is a dumbass. |
| KitH | This user is crushing your head! Crush, crush!. |
| Mr. Show |
This user remembers a time when people named Bob and David wore crazy outfits and brought us all to the verge of laughter. |
| SNL | This user would like to give some important advice on surviving a flaming...live from New York, it's Saturday Night!! |
| TCR | This user knows the population of elephants has tripled in the past six months. |
| Bob & Tom | This user listens to The Bob & Tom Show. |
| Hicks | This user likes Bill Hicks and doesn't give a fuck if you like him or hate him. |
| BSG | This user is a fan of the reimagined Battlestar Galactica series. |
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This user knows that 42 is the Answer to the Ultimate Question of Life, the Universe, and Everything. |
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This user believes any answer I give will be wrong and the Senior Drill Instructor will only beat this user harder if I reverse myself. |
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This user named their rifle Charlene. |
| FC | This user is not a beautiful or unique snowflake. |
User:Gxti/Userboxes/Fight Club 2
| The Ugly | When this user has to shoot, he shoots. Doesn't talk. |
| The Bad | This user will see you soon, idiots. |
| The Good | In this world, there's two kinds of users: Those with loaded guns, and those who dig. You dig. |
| Pulp Fiction | This user knows that in France, they call a Quarter Pounder a Royale With Cheese because of the metric system. |
| PULP | The truth is...you're the weak, and I'm the tyranny of evil men. But I'm tryin' Ringo...I'm tryin' REAL HARD to be the shepherd. |
 | This user has got red on him. |
 | This user thinks 2001: A Space Odyssey is the best science fiction film of all time. |
| BAMF | This user is one BAMF among many |
 | This user supports the United States Navy. |
 | This user is interested in the Vietnam War. |
 | This user supports the troops. |
| LEGAL | This user supports LEGAL Immigration. |
 | This user believes that Stephen Colbert will be elected in the 2012 United States Presidential Election. |
 | This user supports NATO. |
 | This user is highly against nazism. |
Bio
edit- Name: HeyZeus Ezekiel Jesus esquire III pt. 4 Redux
- Age: -4,000 x 2 + Y(X - 12)
- Birthplace: the Black Forest of the Village of a Thousand Young
- Location: The Dirty South
- Ethnicity: Demigod
- Weapon(s):
- Ancient bone saber of Zumakalis!
- The sword I made form the horn of a Narwhal (It died of natural causes....... a bullet in its face)
- The Gustav Gun
- M16A3 with a M203 under-barrel grenade launcher and a tactical scope for precision medium distance headshot assassinations of old people.
- Remington 870 tactical with incinerary shells.
- BFG9000.
- Street Sweeper.
- Stagg X400-GBK "X Metal" solid body electric guitar, Ibanez bass guitar, and Second hand Epiphone G-40 guitar all played through a Peavey Bandit 65 amplifier.
Awards and Recognition colon
edit- Nobel Peace prize in the field of Kick-Ass.
Bibliography colon
edit- Whiskey Tango Foxtrot series of kick-ass Thrash metal goodness. (1776)
- The Bible Part 2 - Crucify This (3)
- How The Nazi Kittens Started World War VIII Part 4.5 (1952)
Discography (Albums you idiots) colon
edit- Dark Satellites
- Flag Burner
- Junkyard God
- Patters of Failure
- Intimate Slavery
- Trojan Whore
- Strangled With a Halo
- Gravedancer
- Carrion Fairy
- Crippled Horses
Vocals, Guitar, and Drums: Me
- Anti-Emo Death Squad by Guillotine Ecstacy (1808.25)
- Emo Holocaust
- Atom Bomb Attack on a AFI concert
- Firebomb Attack on a MCR concert
- Screamo Bands SUCK!!!
- Grinding My Core of Kick-Ass Upon Your Sad Black Text on Black Stone Tombstone, BITCH!
Vocals and Guitar: Me
Bass: Fat Guy #1/Me
Drums: Fat Guy #2/My Clone
Filmography (Movies appearances of kick-assness)
edit| Year | Title | Role | Note(s) |
| 10 | Banana Pudding of Massacre Boulevard | Guy at Wedding | |
| 0 | Happy Birthday Jason Harry Crisp | Dave | |
| Cannibals | Cannibal #5 | Internet Movie | |
| -53 | Pyramid of Blood Scheme Perpetrated by Dracula | Mercenary | |
| Blood Spiral | That Guy | Scene Deleted | |
| Terror Core | Dude #1 | Died on Set | |
| 1945 | Sleep Away Camp 5: Teddy Bear Massacre 3 | Man Shaving | |
| Illegally Insane | Kid at Police Station | Cameo | |
| The Fargate | Wraith Elite #2 | Academy Award Nominee | |
| Jesus Said "SHUT THE FUCK UP!!" | Leviathan | ||
| When the Sun Goes Down | Guy Holding Michael's Severed Head | Cameo | |
| 1287 | Firebombs Over Tokyo | Dave Jefferson | |
| No Man's Land | Tex | ||
| Roadkill | Paul |
TV (Appearances of kick-assness)
edit| Year | Title | Role | Not(es) |
| 1922-2234 | Whiskey Tango Foxtrot | Zeus | Sixty-Three Episodes (two have yet to air) |
| 1936 | Law and Order: Meter Maids on Mercury | Guy with the Lamborghini | Guest star, 1 episode |
| 1989 | Law and Order: Breakfast Menu Order Intent | Guy who buys the hashbrowns | One episode |
| 2234-2276 | Snuff Film Bloopers | Host | Longest Running Underground TV show ever |
| 2321-present | Hammer Smashed Face | Sergeant Orslo | Emmy Award |
| Year | Title | Role | Not(es) |
| 1948 | Whiskey Tango Foxtrot the Death Metal Musical | Zeus | |
| 1952 | Whiskey Tango Foxtrot Webisodes One and Half-of-Two | Sergeant Davidson |
Video Games
edit- Baby Nightmare Massacre III [The game so bad-ass it was able to by pass the original and the first sequel, which was controversial in its own right] (1971) Better than that stupid Final Fantasy crap! God, how could anyone like that stupid thing? It's always the same damn thing every fucking release! - Killer #4, Jeff
- Douchebag Manhunt - Miami Beach (1964) - Officer Tompkins
Other Inventions colon
edit- Shotgun Mouthwash now in Cinnamon, SO BUY IT!! (Other flavors include: Banana pudding, Strawberry, Sour Apple, Chicken/Generic Flavor #3, Watermelon, Kurt Cobain, Fruit Punch, Blueberry, Per Yngve Ohlin, Snuff film, Master Blaster, Pipe Cleaner, Menthol, Cheeseburger, Fast Food, Peppermint, Mentha spicata and others)
- The Universe.
- Heaven.
- Hell.
- Hel.
- Your mom.
Misc
edit- I like Banana pudding.
- Grindcore is the most awesome genre of music to ever be created.
SO IT HAS BEEN WRITTEN SO IT SHALL COME TO PASS!!! (I didn't to steal that from a source I cannot name right now)
- Aqua Teen Hunger Force is the comedy of the gods. Because only a poor man has one god.
- I am the Omega.
- Everyone in The Dwarves will go to "Heaven"
- I am the Highlander.
- I fought in the first Milky Way-Andromeda War from 2123 - 2134.
- I believe in euthanasia of the elderly (see Assisted Living Dracula)
- I created the Universe with my creativeness.