User:Hymie the SpelChek™ bot
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This robotic user is a sock-puppet of Carlb, created as a placeholder in case the strange pattern of creating and using a second account for every even vaguely evil 'bot operation ever finds its way over here to Uncyclopedia.
SpelChek™ is an unregistered trademark of Clyde, himself named for the rather-bored Pac-Man character, and may itself turn out to be mispelled.
As the SpelChek™ operation requires manual, one-at-a-time editor oversight by nature (lest it attempt to replace Mary Poppins with opium poppies again), it may make no sense whatsoever to move this to another account... but since when has that stopped the proliferation of useless sock-puppets on any other wiki?
- This robot has also won some Awards.
SpelChek™ is evil and dangerous![edit | edit source]
SpelChekers would have us believe (from Undictionary) that their mission entails:
- v. To senselessly beat articles until American text changes to English text (see the English-American Dictionary for more information)
FINALLY! somebody is sorting the american english out! i hate saying favorite instead of favourite, or color instead of COLOUR! LEARN TO SPELL YOU AMERICAN
- Note: In your future "learn to spell" rants, please remember that there is more than one person living in America at the present time. Hence, Americans. Furthermore, color over colour is hardly an imposition: it's not as if you are too dumb to understand it. The real evil which must be fought is Fake British Accents.
The Evil unleashed[edit | edit source]
If only spelchekers were so harmless and innocent! The unprintable SpelChek™ evil may include:
- Changing your Schick™ razor to a Chick Razor.
- Turning meanies into mealies in order to wipe out its natural enemies.
- Turning your papier maché into paper ache, causing nasty paper cuts.
- Changing all your stocking stuffers to stocking suffers, so as to completely ruin your giftmas holiday.
- Changing seasonal caroling to cajoling to add one more Grinch-like touch.
- Turning BOOBS into BLOBS... 'nuff said?
WARNING: It gets worse![edit | edit source]
- One rogue spelcheker, upon rejecting Stalinism as stolen, went on to label Gorbachev as garbage and rejected his peristroika reforms as pedestrian. It and its creators are now freezing in the gulags of Scarberia.
- Another dæmonic spelcheker thought to replace ruthless enforcer with ruthless informer in news reports; its helpless, unfortunate victim was quickly baleeted by accomplices at Mafia™ Inc. a division of the Cosa Nostra™ Corporation, a Black Hand™ enterprise.
The automated link handling is no better; so you're "the toast of Manhattan", you claim? Uh, should that link to sliced bread, New York City or the Manhattan Project? Too late... the demonic robots have presumed the latter and already launched all of the nyucculular missiles which George W. Bush had been stockpiling for evil and mayhem.
Do not leave SpelChek™ software to run unattended! It is dangerous and potentially deadly!
Hymie the SpelChek™ bot[edit | edit source]
Constructed on doomsday at Radioactive Surplus Machinery Inc. on the old radio row of downtown Chernobyl, Hymie the SpelChek™ bot ruthlessly edits Uncyclopedia solely because it has really nothing better to do.
Maybe if the bot were rewritten to do something different, such as only removing broken wiki red links (better dead than red, according to McCarthy!) or perform some menial task like generating the Undictionary:A through Z list pages, or something equally fsck'ing boring, it would be able to run unattended under a sock-puppet user id, who knows.
But that's neither here nor there; using this to generate the index for a dictionary is trivial, but even red link cleanup can be controversial as it discriminates on the basis of both colour and color.
See User:Hymie_the_SpelChek™_bot/editarticle.py for an open-source main script, based on pywikibot, to invoke an external editor for SpelChek™ use. Typical output:
- Checked for running processes. 1 processes currently running, including the current process.
- Page to edit: Vending machine
- Getting editpage wikicities:uncyclopedia:Vending_machine
- Getting HTMLpage wikicities:uncyclopedia:Vending_machine
- Beverage not found in Vending machine
Other Evil Robots on Uncyclopedia[edit | edit source]
- Ants
- Autobots
- Bill Clinton 2
- C3-PO
- Cyborg Jesus
- Dick Cheney
- Female Autobots
- Happiness Robot
- Ross Perot
- Ratzinger Z
- Robot Bears
- Unicron
- WD-40
See also[edit | edit source]
- Uncyclopedia: Community Portal
- Red link and Blue link
- English-American Dictionary
- American-English Dictionary
- Undictionary
- Gibberish
- WordGirl
- Sailor Venus
- spell check
Download[edit | edit source]
It is probably not a sock puppet, but hopefully an automated or semi-automated account for making repetitive edits that would be extremely tedious to do manually (or so we'd like you to think).
Administrators: if this bot is malfunctioning or causing harm, tough fucking shit.